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Dear Columbia College

Sep 7th, 2011
by Pirate Alice.
1 comment

Dear Columbia College,

As an alumna of your illustrious institution I am always open to receiving correspondence from you. I hope to attend more events created for all of us graduates. I want to network with others and attend writing workshops. However, your latest missive was a huge fail.

I can’t even read this. When I mouse over the links, NOTHING CHANGES. I still can’t read it.  A school known for art and design should not be sending this type of awful unreadable spam to alumni. Honestly they shouldn’t be sending it to anyone.

Who is responsible for this? I hang my head in SHAME as a graduate of Columbia College after receiving this.

Sincerely,

Pattie

Posted in: crap, lameness, Open Letter, Stupid.

Failure

Sep 1st, 2011
by Pirate Alice.
2 comments

What would you do if you knew you could not fail?

I need to ask myself this question far more often.  The past couple of weeks I allowed this fear of failure to get in my way. I made all kinds of excuses and talked myself out of doing my project for class. The only person I was hurting was me. Why did I let this fear of failure take over? I spent Monday & Tuesday of this week working on the project and aside from a much deeper belief that CSS was created to torment me, it was nothing. It was the easy-peasy thing I KNEW it would be, but still, that fear stopped me in my tracks. I turned in my assignment before checking it in other browsers. Luckily IE is the only one it doesn’t work in but if you’re still using IE you’re an idiot anyway and should die a terrible horrible painful death. Seriously people, grow some balls, install Chrome or FireFox or Opera, your life will be better for it. TRUST ME I’m a web developer in training!

Back to the topic of fear…

Fear the BEHOLDER!

Back to the fear and failure topic…  We all suffer from fear. What we fear is this thing that in our minds becomes this huge monstrous beast that will torment you and tear you limb from limb and eat your entrails while you take your final breaths. But the reality is never nearly as awful as what we create out of fear. Overcoming the fear is the hardest part. Realizing that what we’re afraid of will never be nearly as bad as what we create in our minds about the situation is really hard. Once you let go of the fear, you can move forward and as you take those first steps, you realize it was never going to be as bad as you were imagining. Why do we constantly do this to ourselves? Why do we create these monsters that stop us from finding joy and happiness? Why do we keep holding ourselves back? Are we really afraid of success? Is being happy such a terrible prospect? Don’t you think you deserve to be happy and successful?

Imagine a hero!

The mighty paladin rolls a crit and gets max damage!

Your imagination is a powerful thing, like all powerful things you need to use it for good. Instead of creating a monster, create a mighty hero, a vanquisher of evil. This warrior will fight to the death on your behalf. He has no fear. Imagine the most awesome things that will happen with this warrior fighting for you. Don’t focus on what can go wrong, focus on what WILL go RIGHT. Focus on what will be amazing as you move forward. Don’t focus on failure, focus on success. Feel that success in the fiber of your being.   Embrace that success and make it real. Ask yourself: what would you do if you knew you could not fail? When you focus on success, in the end, you can only succeed because you wont give up until you do.

Posted in: general idocy, How to get what you want, Love, scary, stuff.

Web Applicaiton Developer Job Lead

Jul 29th, 2011
by Pirate Alice.
Comments are off for this post

I got this email today, feel free to share openly with whoever you think might fit. I get nothing for sharing except a warm fuzzy feeling inside.

 

One of Paladin’s leading global manufacturer in a near north Chicago suburb has an immediate for a Contract IT/ Web Applications Developer for a long-term, contract assignment.  

The Web Applications Developer is responsible for developing an overall strategy, design and implementation for corporate Internet websites, an intranet, an extranet and web applications. This role will collaborate with Marketing, Sales and other business  groups.   The overall efforts include the organization of concepts into a design of information architecture;  interface design, programming, scripting and publishing of website information, and design and development of web based applications.

The Web Applications Developer will ensure that sites are built using search engine optimized structures and administer content management tools to allow content ownership across the entire organization.  The Web Applications Developer will coordinate this effort with business units, system administrators, programmers, graphic designers, writers/editors.

Primary Responsibilities

  • Full technical knowledge in all areas of content management and enterprise content management applications.
  • Working knowledge and demonstrated experience using application software and graphics design to develop and maintain the Internet, intranet, and extranet websites.
  • Develops and deploys best practice tools for content management including user managed content areas.  Works with a variety of third party content suppliers to ensure that format, taxonomy and other Sloan specifications are adhered to.
  • Works closely with programmers, Marketing, and artists to ensure that the website is developed and tested according to specifications which allow for content sharing between systems.
  • Monitors site usage and performance.  Makes changes and suggests options to stakeholders to ensure that sites are performing optimally.  Uses search engine optimization (SEO) techniques to ensure site content is positioned correctly in search results
  • Responsible for coordination of all web projects for all the company’s divisions.

 

The Ideal Candidate will have:

  • Minimum of five years direct experience in enterprise content management and web development.
  • Bachelor’s degree in Information Technolofy or comparable field.
  • Must possess technical knowledge of Open Text web content management applications (formerly RedDot).
  • Significant hands-on experience with HTML, JAVA script, JAVA, ActiveX, server-side scripting languages, VB Script, ASP.NET, IIS, Apache, AJAX, jQuery, JOSON, CSS, XML, SOAP, etc.
  • Must have experience developing web applications utilizing SQL databases.  Experience must include defining database requirements, writing applications to access, updating and maintain the database through web based interfaces.
  • Experience with design and development using Microsoft SharePoint software is highly desirable

Knowledge, Skills & Abilities

·         The Web Applications Developer may possesses knowledge of fields as diverse as network configuration, interface and graphic design, software development, Internet tools and technologies, business strategy, writing, marketing, and project management.

·         Familiarity with graphic design and multimedia applications such as Photoshop, Dreamweaver, Real Audio, and Adobe Flash is desireable.

 

Start date: Immediate
Duration of Assignment: 3 to 6 months
Location: Onsite,

Hourly rate ranges from $45 to $50, depending on the skill level and background
Expenses are reimbursed and requires receipts.

If you’re interested and qualified for the role, please send the following immediately to maricel@paladinstaff.com to be considered for this great opportunity:

·    Updated resume in word format; No PDFs please.

·    Required: Portfolio URL link

·    Required: Cover letter highlighting relevant experience related to this role.

·    Three references

·    Hourly rate through a staffing agency

Submissions without all of the above will not be considered. 

Must be authorized to work in the US

Candidates who closely matches our client’s requirements will be contacted.

Posted in: Uncategorized.

The Great Raspberry Massacre of 2011

Jul 28th, 2011
by Pirate Alice.
Comments are off for this post

I felt it best not to take photos, but there is a photo of my pants during the battle over on Google+

It all started when I popped over at the very small (like five booths) farmers market outside the Sears Tower (it will NEVER be Willis Tower) after an appointment this morning. The idea of farm fresh raspberries, plums and peaches were too much to pass up.  I pulled out my handy tote bag that folds up into its self and told the guy I didn’t need a bag.  The plums and raspberries were placed into the bag in their little green containers. I added a cucumber and then went to the peach guy. He had little wooden containers, but I took the peaches out and left it for him to reuse.  I then ran across the street to Panera Bread. Once I was seated with my bagel and coffee I started to rearrange everything in my messenger bag, that’s when I saw the beginning of the battle. The tote bag was dripping with the blood of raspberries. I ran to the counter and asked for some plastic bags. They gave me two.  I started pulling out the heavy fruit, stuck my hand in one bag and started scooping up the raspberry survivors as well as the dead and wounded, turning the bag inside out to contain them all. Once I had the raspberry puree (the kind you find in a second hand store) bagged up I placed everything back in the tote bag and put the tote in the other plastic bag I was given. I thought at best I could make some raspberry vinaigrette out of it, maybe a small smoothie.

Alas, upon arrival home I discovered the raspberry bag had a leak and oozed everywhere. Three of the peaches were severely wounded in battle, one plum was mortally wounded. The cucumber came out covered in raspberry guts but uninjured. It’s all very sad, but I’ve learned a valuable lesson about my responsibility to ensure the safety of all raspberries in the future.

Posted in: awesome stuff, crap, Food.

Google Music vs Spotify

Jul 19th, 2011
by Pirate Alice.
4 comments

I managed to get invitations to a couple of new online music services – Google Music and Spotify.

Google Music is in beta. How Google Music works is, you upload your music files to “the cloud” and then you can access your music wherever you are from any mobile device or computer. Even if you’re offline the recently played songs will be available. You can also select songs you really like to always be available offline. You download the music manager to your computer that will then start the upload of your music once you tell it where the files are located. This happens in the background so unless you’ve got a very slow machine you really shouldn’t notice any difference in computer performance while this is happening.

The worst part about Google Music is the amount of time it takes to upload all your music, especially if you’ve got a lot. I believe the program told me it found about 14,000 files on my external hard drive.  I’ve had access to this for about 6 days now and I’ve only got a fraction of my files uploaded, (about 2,000). Now, just to be fair, as I’ve said, my music files are on an external hard drive. I don’t always have it hooked up to my computer and I don’t always have my computer on. I’ve left it on and hooked up over the weekend to try and get this to finish more quickly. I’ve noticed that any files with embedded DRM will NOT upload.  So, not ALL your music will be available.  Once a number of files are uploaded though you can get access pretty quickly on a mobile device and start listening. I’ve installed the app on my Android phone and I’ve created a playlist and I’ve been listening since this past weekend. As long as you’ve got a strong signal, the songs play seamlessly. Making playlists is very simple through the phone app. Just press and hold the song listing, a menu will pop up, pick “add to playlist” and then either create a new playlist or select one already created.  Any playlists you create on your phone/mobile device will show up when you log in on a computer. The web interface is simple to use as well. Just click the plus sign next to playlist, name it and then go to your list of music and select the songs you want to add through the little menu square.

Google Music is currently free, but again, it’s in beta and you need an invitation. When I heard about Google Music I searched for it and requested an invite through the website, I got one within a week. As far as I can tell Google Music does not have it’s own library of music to show you new artists or let you stream music you don’t already own. This service is strictly for your personal music library.

The other new music service on the internets is Spotify.  Spotify has been around in Europe and it is just starting up in the US. The free version is only available by invitation, but if you’ve got a Klout account they’re offering up invites. I asked for an invite at the Spotify website when I first heard of it and I got one within a few days of asking. Although by that time I had already signed up using the Klout code I received. If you want to pay for one of their premium services you can get in immediately. I haven’t played around much with Spotify yet but I did download the player to my computer. It looks and feels  a lot like iTunes. However, on the free version there are giant ads that block some of what I need to see on my tiny netbook screen and there’s no intuitive way to adjust the size or move things around. The online player for Google Music has no ads. I was able to listen to songs in the Spotify library immediately including the new Duran Duran song and a couple others that they suggested to me. Once you tell it where your music files are you can start listening immediately to your own library. Compared to Google Music this is much faster. It was a couple of days before the web interface of Google Music would let me even see that songs had uploaded (even though I could already access some of them with my phone.)

Premium members of Spotify can stream songs from the Spotify library on their phone, while the free or Unlimited users can only listen to their own music that Spotify recognizes and has a license for. This is very much like Google Music that wont upload files with DRM in them. It is possible you might have some tracks that Spotify doesn’t have a license for that you wont be able to stream on your phone… this blows if you ask me.

I’m not sure how either of these applications would handle any existing iTunes playlists since I haven’t bothered with iTunes for some time now.  I’ve been without a good chunk of my music library after the crash of a desktop computer. I didn’t want to hook my iPod up to anything and risk losing all the music I have on it.  Honestly I’m sick to death of the record labels and all of these services catering to their demands. Whatever happened to fair use? I’ve bought this music and I’ve taken the time to load it onto my machine. Why can’t I listen to it on ANY player I own or may own in the future?  OK, no more ranting.

Why would you choose Spotify over Google Music? Well, if you want something to suggest new songs to you and let you listen to stuff you don’t own and maybe share playlists with friends then Spotify is for you.  Keep in mind you can only share music that Spotify is licensed to share though. UPDATED TO ADD: You must have the PREMIUM account to listen to any music NOT ALREADY ON YOUR PHONE. You can not access your home library on your phone if you don’t have the premium account. It does give you the option to sync wirelessly to your music, but if I’m on my home wireless why would I want to listen on my phone? The computer is right there…

Why would you use Google Music over Spotify? If you only want access to your own library and maybe want some kind of online back up for all of it (I haven’t looked into using this as an online backup system for my music, but I’m thinking this would be a great way to backup my stuff ) if you own many computers and devices and want to be able to get your music no matter what machine you’re on, this would be ideal for you. Especially if you’ve got a LOT of music. Initial set up will take some time, but it could be worth it. Aside from the music manager to be able to upload songs to the cloud there is nothing to download.  As long as you have access to the internet you can listen to your library wherever you are. Are you a freelancer? Want to listen to your stuff when working on-site? Use Google Music, just log in and everything is there for you to listen to and you don’t need admin rights to load a player. Do you travel a lot? Use a netbook without much drive space? As long as you can get to Google Music you can access your tunes! If you use Spotify you’ve got to download the player on EVERY COMPUTER you use in order to listen to anything.

I’m going to keep playing around with both of these to see which one I like best. If you’ve got an opinion I’d love to hear it!

Posted in: awesome stuff, music.
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